Breastfeeding feels impossible? Here's the real root cause, and how to fix it naturally
“Why is breastfeeding so hard for me, when it seems so easy for everyone else?
“Why am I in so much pain when my baby latches?”
“Why am I not good enough, what is wrong with me?”
You are not broken. You are not alone. And there’s a real explanation no one has told you yet…
In this blog, I am going to give you the real reason breastfeeding is so difficult–the root cause that nobody talks about–and what you can do about it so you can have the breastfeeding journey you dream of.
Why is breastfeeding so hard?
So why is breastfeeding so hard? The bottom line is: your baby has tension.
The normal tone for a newborn should be relaxed, borderline floppy. If your baby is tense–holding their head up, clenching their fists, even holding their hands high up by their head–it means their nervous system is stressed, and therefore, they are going to have an extremely difficult time latching, sucking, and swallowing efficiently.
What are the signs my baby has tension?
Prefers one side
Sustained or persistent arching
Consistent head tilt to the same direction
Pulling away from the breast shortly after latching
Straining to poop
Constantly clenches fists
Never seems comfortable
If you checked two or more, this blog was made for you and we'd love to help.
What's causing baby's tension?
How could a baby that’s only a couple hours old hold so much tension in their little body? The most common cause is birth.
Think about how much force was put on the baby’s head to come out. During a vaginal birth every contraction from the uterus compresses the baby’s body into their head which is used as a battering ram to open the gateway to the outside world.
During vacuum and c-section births, the baby is pulled out through a traction force applied to their head. The spinal cord is the most vulnerable to that traction force. But thankfully, in most cases we cannot easily see the outward effects of that stress. However, I believe clinically we see the effects of this stress, and the place we see it first and most is during breastfeeding.
What role do I play?
Not only is your baby tense, but we’d bet our student loans that you are tense, too, Mom.
Breastfeeding is a whole body experience, for both you and your baby. Most advice focuses on your breast or your baby’s mouth, but breastfeeding involves the entire body.
When my wife struggled to breastfeed our son, the pain created a stress loop. Just the thought of feeding triggered her fight-or-flight response. Her body would tense up, and that tension transferred directly to our baby, making everything harder.
If breastfeeding has felt like an uphill battle and nothing seems to be working, you’re not alone. There is hope, and it truly can get easier, even if you’ve tried everything.
How can I reduce tension?
Relaxation is key—not just for birth, but for nursing too.
Just like you learned to breathe through contractions, calming your nervous system by deep, mindful breathing can ease tension, reduce pain, and help your body function the way it was designed to.
Breastfeeding doesn’t just rely on milk, it relies on regulation. And when your body is regulated, your baby can feel that too.
How is the nervous system connected to breastfeeding challenges?
Why does tension matter? Here’s something most advice completely overlooks: breastfeeding is controlled by the nervous system.
When a baby is under stress (usually from birth), their nervous system can go into “fight or flight” mode. This makes it harder for their body to relax, coordinate, and function like it’s meant to.
To adapt, the body creates neuro-structural shifts, or subluxations: subtle misalignments in the spine and skull that interfere with how messages travel between the brain and body.
Common patterns we see in practice:
*This chart gives a very broad connection between locations of neurostructural shifts and their effects. The true effects are systemic. Every area of the body affects every other, but these are very common patterns that we will see clinically.
Does my baby have a tongue tie?
Over the past decade, more and more babies are being diagnosed with tongue ties. But here’s what most people don’t talk about:
Tongue function is just as important as tongue appearance. Tension from birth, especially in the neck and upper spine, can affect how the tongue moves, even if there's no obvious anatomical tie. And that tension may be coming from nervous system stress your baby experienced during labor or delivery.
That’s why in our office, we look at the whole picture before jumping to surgery:
We assess nerve function and cranial movement
We gently release tension through chiropractic adjustments
And when needed, we refer to trusted oral tie specialists
The result? Many babies improve without surgery, or have much better outcomes with it when their nervous system is regulated first.
What can I do right now to help my baby breastfeed better?
In order to get to the root of what is happening with your baby, we have to address the root cause, not just deal with the symptoms. So here are some things that you can implement immediately to help improve your breastfeeding experience.
Ways to Help Regulate Your Nervous System:
Breathe with intention; box breathing is a great technique
Re-introduce birthing techniques to help your body relax
Get out in nature. Breathe fresh air, feel the ground, see the sun
Ways to Help Regulate Baby’s Nervous System:
Skin-to-skin time
Slow, rhythmic rocking and movement
Bodywork (chiropractic, craniosacral therapy, infant massage)
Limiting overstimulation (lights, noise, transitions)
Consistent contact and bonding moments
How can chiropractic care help with breastfeeding?
If these right-now relaxation techniques aren’t working and breastfeeding is still difficult, it’s time to try a deeper, lasting solution: chiropractic care.
Gentle, specific pediatric chiropractic care clears stress from the nervous system, so your baby’s body can do what it’s designed to do: eat, sleep, poop, and grow with ease!
When we clear nervous system tension through gentle chiropractic care, we often see that:
✅ Baby latches more effectively
✅ Feeding becomes less painful
✅ Gas and reflux improve
✅ Baby feels calmer and sleeps better
✅ You feel confident again
What does chiropractic care for babies look like?
At Slainte Chiropractic, we take a unique and thorough approach to achieve the best results for your baby’s health.
We use the Gonstead technique to analyze where in your baby’s spine tension is trapped and perform gentle spinal adjustments to release that tension. Additionally, Dr. Vin will perform a cranial nerve exam (watch here!) and make gentle, corrective adjustments to their cranial bones as necessary.
How has it helped other moms?
At Slainte Chiropractic, we take pride in having helped hundreds of babies and moms improve their breastfeeding journeys. In fact, it is the number one reason moms come to us!
See these real quotes and stories from our moms, below:
“Dr. Vin helped me & my baby through the hardest season of breastfeeding. Chiro care for my baby made a world of difference, I’m so thankful.” - Maya B.
Why choose Slainte Chiropractic?
Dr. Vin is one of the most highly trained pediatric chiropractors in the state of Florida. He has received two certifications from the International Chiropractic Pediatric Association (ICPA) and has conducted thousands of hours of additional research and training in pediatrics. He received his Certification by the Academy Council of Chiropractic Pediatrics (CACCP) and his Diplomate in Clinical Chiropractic Pediatrics (DICCP), rendering him an expert in pediatric chiropractic!
Ready for real relief?
We’d love to support your breastfeeding journey—no pressure, just answers.
In our office, we get to hear your story via a phone consultation. Then on your first day in the office, your baby will receive a neurological scan using iNsight technology, a full cranial and palate exam, and their first adjustment.
Call us at 904-718-6330 or book online here!
